kind of phony

got sucked back into metal gear solid after making too many mgs3 gifs lately. i forgot how much this fucking series makes me cry. like for everyone. i love everyone. so much. and then i remembered how much big boss/ocelot moved me and how that particular relationship is the fuel and backbone of pretty much the whole plot and oh god poor ocelot. and eva. and big boss. and then i stayed up too late sobbing in bed over gorgeous bb/ocelot fanfiction like this one (a lovely mgs au take on john f. kennedy's assassination, and its sadly unfinished sequel) which is pretty much everything i ever wanted in fanfiction ugh.

(and everytime i make a mgs3 gif and admire ocelot's cheekbones, i look up at the lee van cleef posters above my desk and then i rewatched the good the bad and the ugly and cried a little about how gorgeous that movie is)

(and then that got me thinking about the dark tower so now i need to reread that whole fucking thing next)

(and then i thought too much about how even though mgs3 is my favorite in the whole franchise and bb/ocelot is my mgs otp above all, solid snake is actually my number one favorite character and how sad mgs4 made me and then i start cracking up at how sorry i feel for liquid, even though i mostly want to beat his face in all the time because he annoys me)

(i'm running on like two hours of sleep, i blame that for this post)